19 May The Drama Queen
She’s holding the baby, and then walks to her husband who’s talking with one of his pals. Then she angrily moves away, gets into the car, shuts the door, pulls the maid into the car and drives off leaving a bewildered husband who is calling after her and his shocked friend. Of course, a casual onlooker would wonder what could have sparked such a demonstration. Perhaps their conversation went something like this.
“Honey, when can we go home?” the wife coos to him.
“Dear, I’m coming. I’ll just be a few minutes.”
“But darling,” she says, putting her hand on his shoulder fully ignoring Jim her husband’s friend who is patiently waiting for her to finish her display. “I am tired. I need to go home and the baby does too.”
“Dear, I’ve heard you. Just give me a few minutes and I’ll be through.”
She moves away from him angrily. “You never listen to me when I’m talking.”
Then she gets into the car and storms off. Her feelings have been hurt and she feels justified in carrying out her display. This is the typical behavior of the drama queen. The one who tries to make small things look bigger than they really are.
Women have been called drama queens by both men and other women for a long time. But what really, are the characteristics of these drama queens?
Drama queens take everything seriously and personally. If a waitress misplaces her order, she feels personally attacked and insulted. Perhaps the waitress didn’t like her nose or something. Because this is how she acts, she’d fail at knowing how to take good natured ribbing from friends or colleagues. Of course, her significant order might be safer if he doesn’t have a sense of humor.
Then, they do not ask for things; they demand for it. Then they whine, cajole and manipulate when they can’t get their way. For example let’s call her DQ. If DQ has a rich boyfriend, she expects him to pay for all her stuff even if they are unplanned. So DQ can call her boyfriend up and say: “I feel like doing a little shopping today, send me 10Gs.” If boyfriend makes the mistake of hesitating or refusing, she could first of all try to wheedle him, calling him pet names and begging him to reconsider. If he remains firm, then she could burst into tears stating that he doesn’t love her or she’d slam the phone on him.
They always need a man in their life for validation. So they don’t mind going into a relationship with the wrong guy because they feel alone. But they aren’t above criticizing him for failing to measure up with their own perceived standards of perfectionism.
Also, the drama queens complain about everything, especially things that can’t be solved. They can complain for hours on end about a noisy neighbor, their bosses, and their jobs or even parts of their anatomy.
Drama queens are control freaks or rescuers. They don’t believe a man can function without their input. So they can go ahead to give him unwarranted and frequently unnecessary advice. They don’t mind telling their men what to eat, what to wear, or even who their friends should be. DQ butts into everything.
She pouts a lot. It might look pretty at first but that petulant look easily gets old after a while. One of the easiest/quickest ways to get her to put on that pretty out is when her guy refuses to spend all his free time with her. Because she can ditch all her friends for him because she wants to ‘please’ him, she expects him to do the same for her. She gets clingy, tearful and insecure when he doesn’t want to do the same. Most times, this attitude pushes the guy farther away as he gets tired of all her drama.
But there’s something funny about the DQ. She hardly ever seems to be alone. Unlike, the woman who needs to be strong, tough, straight, head screwed on tight, never needy and totally universally liked by men but not in a relationship with any one of them. But, I digress. My point is, the DQ is attractive to many men. Why is this?
One of the reasons may be because she is so interesting. They might be caught up in her spontaneity and vivacity and her unpredictability. Never a dull moment with DQ. Also, she might help to feed their ego because she’s so needy she can never do anything on her own. So guys can ignore the signs because they are wowed by such a vivacious personality.
Here’s another thought. Like attracts like so the guys may be drama kings themselves!
Having said all these, I think it is wrong for some guys to label acceptably normal behavior as drama. Sometimes, the partner needs to express their feelings and they should be allowed to. For example, if a wife expresses her disappointment that her husband forgets her anniversary, should she be called a drama queen? Certainly not. Or if a girl asks her boyfriend for some advice about some issues she ‘s having with one of her colleagues, should she be called a drama queen? Definitely not.
The major defining characteristic about the DQ is their self-centeredness, and their excessive emotional lability. That’s them basically. Love em or leave em.
P.S: Do you think the drama queen has a capacity for change? Do you know any DQs? Share your experiences in the comment box.